Male-female relations in today's society, the concept of marriage. Part II



ADNAN OKTAR: ... there is also a very intense love in believers. People are sometimes unable to fathom the wisdom in this. People who do not experience it cannot fathom it. These people are experiencing their sixth sense. In other words, unknown to them a miracle is taking place. Passion is a miracle. It is a profound delight. Some people impersonate passion when they talk, saying they love whoever it is very much. But why do they immediately insult, attack, denigrate and upset the other person when their material interests conflict? In that case it is not passion. It means they have heard about a passion coming from the revealed religions.  You know subconsciously that it is a good thing. Unbelievers know it subconsciously, too, but they do not experience it. The believer knows it subconsciously and, most importantly, experiences it. Allah makes him experience it. In other words, Allah creates this special feeling, this special system, in the person. For example, if you ask a believer to describe the feeling he cannot do so, but will experience it as an intense delight. And passion does not leave a Muslim when they age. But what such people, a young man who loves a girl, call passion will fly away when she falls ill and changes appearance even a little.

TEMPO TV: Love comes to an end.

ADNAN OKTAR:  Love comes to an end. What does that mean? It means the person has experienced a very poor imitation of real passion, has longed for passion but does not know what real passion is. But if someone loves with real passion, then even if the beloved’s face or hands are burned he or she will just love that person even more and feel an even deeper affection for them. Whereas if one loves with true passion, if one’s face and hands are on fire, then the beloved will love one more, with a profound love and affection, because they know they will see its true face in Paradise and how perfect it will be, and that they will live together for all time.  Passion in false love may last 10 years, or 5, or 3 or even only a few months, but true passion is forever.  Because you love Allah and you love as a manifestation of Allah, and you know that Allah will bestow that manifestation for all eternity, for which reason you bind yourself to the person with a deep love and the desire to be with them for ever, with an unquenchable love. Otherwise, even a child will realize how false it would be to talk of passion for an entity will know will die and cease to exist, especially if one believes they came about through evolution and are actually a kind of ape.


ADNAN OKTAR: In other words a truly devout man and truly devout woman live together in an intense passion, and their love increases many times over. I can describe it as exponential, 2,4,8,16... Their love grows strongly and they are most delighted with one another. Their existence delights them and their hearts open up as soon as they set eyes on one another. But other people just go to the coffee house or outside and only want to be rid of the other party. They find peace when they do not have to see one another. That shows the intense nature of the problem. That is why Allah says that devout women are for devout men. And unbelieving men for unbeliever women. People far removed from the religion of Allah, in other words. And that is how it is in Paradise. Allah says that believer women have eyes for their husbands alone. He is referring to women bound with true passion. Allah emphasizes this first of all. Passion. In other words we are looking at loyalty, devotion and passion. Allah has set this out as the source of a tenacious desire. This is a blessing on believers in this world and in the Hereafter. But the secret is unique to them. Women who are unaware of this collapse quickly. It’s a pity. In other words, that suffering and trouble is quickly reflected in the bodies of their beautiful souls. It also causes them to collapse physically. Lack of love lies at the heart of the way women fall apart and lose their beauty so soon. Love is the best food of the soul. The cells and the whole body recognize love. The eye cell and the eye become very large through love. The skin becomes more beautiful and tauter through love. The voice becomes very lovely and impressive, and the body’s electricity becomes most lovely. It affects the hair and the skin. But when love departs, it is as if the body has a cancer, cancer of the hair, for instance. The eyes become cancerous. The tongue and lips and everywhere become cancerous. That applies to both men and women. That is why early collapse leads to such ugliness, harshness and thinness. But men and women who are believers become much, much more attractive. Under the influence of faith and love. This is a secret of Allah. But people are ignorant of it. Most people are unaware of it. 


ADNAN OKTAR: Real, genuine women are powerfully affected by intelligence. And an intelligent man will be powerfully affected by the intelligence in a woman. Allah has created them for one another. The thing they delight in most is that spiritual joy. In other words, one will be affected to the second or third degree by flesh and blood. But it is the eyes that reveal a woman’s soul. Love flows through a woman’s eyes. For someone who is intelligent. Love also flows from an intelligent man right inside the woman. An enormous mutual flow is set up. This turns into a joy that powerfully affects the whole body. For example, an intelligent person, an intelligent woman’s voice also has a powerful effect. It has a powerful impact on the soul. Their speech also has a powerful impact. Their expressions and words alone have a hugely powerful impact. But this is a mutual phenomenon, and these attributes are the same for men and women. 

ADNAN OKTAR: And an intelligent woman hates to look with love at a stupid person. A woman will be disgusted, and she cannot hide it, she is not strong enough. Women with those lovely eyes, so full of love and able to look so delightfully, remain rigid and withered up. They are unable to find any such person. Yet a woman wants to pour all her love into someone. And she wants to receive and absorb love in return. But they can find no such object. They only very rarely find such a person. But they use their logic here. And that is when they find themselves in deep trouble. Because they then look for their own advantage. They find what they are looking for, but find personal advantage, as well. But instead of doing it for Allah’s approval and love of Him, expecting no personal advantage, they fall into satan’s snare. 



ADNAN OKTAR: My answer to the question of what a devout woman should be like is that she is in love with Allah, meaning that she has totally surrendered herself to Him. She has entirely freed herself from worldly concerns, from greed, discord, envy and jealousy.

For example, a jealous woman’s face will be dirtied and dark, in other words not very nice. A lack of light emanates from her face. In other words a greedy woman has no internal richness, in other words, Allah withdraws the majesty from her face. Because what we call woman is that profound power in her soul, not the flesh and blood. Because everyone, even horses and donkeys, have two front and rear legs. All animals have them. There is a deep force in the soul, a power stemming from moral virtue as a miracle from Allah, and that is what we call woman, and it is that which affects believers. It is that which cannot be described but which we see as love of Allah.

Think of a woman who says she is jealous, who envies and fights, who has worldly greed, she says that she can still be beautiful, but let her go and look in the mirror, she is not really beautiful at all. Her soul can never be beautiful, she can never find joy and she can never find passion. She can never find the beauty of being a woman. So the man will be unaffected by her. Allah bestows coldness on such people’s souls. Whatever they do, they cannot attain that beauty. They can make themselves up as much as they like, wear what they like and behave as they like, but that repulsion and darkness in their souls will still be upon them. It is the same with men. Men can pretty themselves up all they like, wear what they like and do whatever they want, but even if they become greater than 2 m in height they will still have no impact on a woman. In other words, so long as a woman sees that stupidity, that greed, that great distance from Allah and that darkness in the soul, he will never be able to establish a link with that power in her soul. She is not affected by him in the slightest.

But a believer absorbs like a sponge, like a sponge absorbing the believer opposite. A believer soaks up love and passion, and that is what we describe as love between husband and wife. Not as in a limited company established to achieve small personal gains. That means just sorrow and suffering. It is mutual. One may take a pretty woman just to show her off to one’s friends. What a degrading thing to do, to show one’s wife off in public just to achieve a social success. A woman may marry a handsome man just to enjoy a success and make her friends envious and say what a good-looking man she married. In such a painful environment, both envy and jealousy arise, there is mutual suffering and a dimness of soul arises, and one party regards the other party as a dull, that is one sees the other party as an empty log and feels the emptiness in the other’s soul.


ADNAN OKTAR: That emptiness creates a hitherto unknown repulsion. No matter what they do, they cannot get rid of it. They then decide to get divorced. But there are many times more people who would like to get divorced but do not. In other words, they have a constant subconscious wish to divorce, and the number of people who are unable to make it a reality is many times greater. For example, and I see this in films, the man comes home and tries to kiss the woman on the back of her neck. The woman is repelled and disgusted by that, but does not let on. Or the woman comes and embraces the man, but the man finds her repellent, is disgusted to think that such an entity is embracing him. But if they look at matters with faith and taqwa, as a manifestation of Allah, then a special power bestowed by Allah enters the equation, one we refer to as the sixth sense, relationship between a man and a woman.

That is why people resort to various means to overcome that coldness. They go down all kinds of strange paths; they go to magic men to have spells lifted off them, they take drugs and use special lotions and go to the doctor for treatment. There are doctors who specialize in this field, as you know. There are famous doctors who have made their name in it.  But these are not problems that can be resolved with doctors, professors, magic men, putty or special drinks. 

These are delights that come with faith, passion, profound intelligence and love of Allah.



ADNAN OKTAR: It is intelligence that most beautifies a woman. In other words, an intelligent woman hypnotizes people and possesses an extraordinary power. If they want a secret, I can tell them the greatest secret of all; a woman with faith and intelligence and who fears Allah can hypnotize an intelligent man, in other words an extraordinary force emerges. That woman possesses a power that cannot be conceived of or imagined, one that has an intense impact on the soul. And she needs to give thanks to Allah for that power that is so very, very effective.  Everything about an intelligent woman is beautiful. She will have a beautiful physical appearance. Allah will beautify her body, and her complexion and everything. This is an absolute law of Allah, something that will definitely come about. Everyone alive will see it. In the same way, an intelligent woman, a highly intelligent woman, will be extraordinarily influenced by an intelligent man. If they want to learn a secret, let me tell them this; that man will literally hypnotize them. The woman feels the spirit and intelligence of an extraordinary power, and the man and woman thus enter one another’s bodies through the eyes and have a profound impact on one another. This is a miracle of Allah. It is a feature unique to truly intelligent people. Irreligious people cannot understand it. If you describe it they will not understand, and they are in no position to understand the suffering that comes from not possessing it. But their souls literally burn from the inability to comprehend this profundity. They cannot understand it, even if you describe it to them. But there is a special secret from Allah for believers, and this is a miracle, a miracle that ignorant people cannot know.  Only through this can someone be beautiful. But one does not come to faith in order to be beautiful, one is beautiful because one believes. A woman who genuinely believes has a huge impact. Because she never lies. A woman who lies it utterly repulsive. A woman who is not genuine, who hides behind a mask, is repulsive. I mean she may be physically very, very attractive, but she will have a purely physical effect on the soul. The impact is the soul and beauty in that entity we call woman, and there is a special electricity we refer to as woman. That only surfaces with profound intelligence, deep sincerity and honesty. A man and a woman who speak the truth delight in one another’s company. But if both are liars, if both play games, as I see in films and on the television, then their false love is utterly degrading and oppressive. The man goes on bended knee before the woman with flowers in his hand and begs for her hand. That is a total disgrace. The women will loathe such falsity and people who behave in such a childish and irrational manner. But she will not let on, or she will pretend not to understand what is happening, and she will also start behaving like a lunatic, resulting in a very unpleasant stage play that hurts everyone involved. And so it goes on.  


ADNAN OKTAR: The best example is for the woman to fully adopt the moral values of the Qur’an as her role model and to behave in the light of Qur’anic moral values and good conscience.  Let me say that a woman who fully heeds the voice of her conscience is the most glorious entity in the world. She is an irreplaceable blessing. A woman who heeds her conscience and who fears Allah is he most delightful and glorious being in the world. She is its greatest blessing. Women should try to attain this blessing. And they should look for people who realize their worth. That is very important, someone who appreciates her worth. Because if she cannot find someone who appreciates her worth, she will be left all alone. And that is a great sadness and very difficult. Something requiring great fortitude and patience.  Because a woman truly wants to be loved. She wants to be loved deeply and with passion. She wants to be loved deeply. But many women seek this but fail to find it. They should be looking in the Qur’an. A man who lives by the moral values of the Qur’an and seeks Allah’s approval most of all, who has taqwa and fear of Allah, a man who had dedicated his whole life to Allah, is someone by whom a woman can be loved. But he has to be highly intelligent. Allah produces a special power in such a man. That fully satisfies the woman’s soul. Otherwise, a woman will be in a constant state of suffering. Nothing you do can help.  They take women on holiday, to dinner, make compliments and the like, as in the films, but that just angers the woman. They bow when they kiss a woman and that will disgust her as if an animal is kissing her. She will be disturbed. But the women put up with it. They embrace them. What I mean is her husband, her halal. She will still be disgusted, even if it is her husband. Then the man makes a joke, and that infuriates her. He refers to something irrational and annoys her. He buys her a present and she realizes he is just trying to win her over, that he is not acting with faith and reason. That annoys her, too. She is further disgusted because he so trusts in his money. That annoys her all the more. They fall out. These things are scourges, not the blessings they imagine. Someone who imagines he can resolve everything with money disgusts himself even more than the other party. Love can only have a profound effect in people if it is based on and stems from passion for and love of Allah. If someone is loved as a manifestation of Allah, then that delight and blessing that so move a person will arise. But otherwise no such thing happens.



ADNAN OKTAR: She was our holy mother who genuinely loved the Prophet Moses (peace be upon him), in whose time she lived, who met him in the palace, who sincerely adopted the monotheistic belief he described and who faced all kinds of risks and dangers to flee with him across the desert and share his life.  She abandoned Pharaoh’s magnificent palace, pomp, blessings, show and sovereignty. She undertook to live with the Prophet Moses in the desert, where the Prophet Moses and the believers spent 40 years, and she never abandoned him. This is of course an excellent model for women. When people decide on marriage and to look for love they will seek taqwa and the greatest possible extent of Allah’s approval. Because Pharaoh had his impressive clothes, vast amounts of food and drink, his magnificent palace and unbelievable blessings, but he had no taqwa, moral virtue or love. Seeing that, this splendid woman joined the Prophet Moses, accepting all the dangers, death and hunger and everything, but still lived with him.



ADNAN OKTAR: Our Prophet’s (saas) wives were very much in love with him. They loved him very much. They regarded him as a manifestation of Allah. They married him for Allah’s approval. And there were women who donated themselves to our Prophet (saas), who gave themselves for Allah.

Our Prophet (saas) says that he was caused to love three things; beautiful scents, women and performing prayer (namaz), as the blessings of this world. Our prophet (saas) was very considerate of his wives and full of love for them. He regarded them as a manifestation of Allah, and they saw the manifestations of Allah in our Prophet (saas). This was a great blessing, and they settled in very well alongside our Prophet (saas).

But some of his wives, as described in Surat at-Tahrim, made mistakes. He told them to keep certain matters secret, but they went and told other people. Then when he questioned his wife about this she asked who had told him, and he said that Allah, the all-Knowing and all-Aware had told him.  It appears from other verses that certain of his wives troubled our Prophet (saas) somewhat. There is a warning where he says, “if you desire the life of this world and its finery, come and I will give you all you need and release you with kindness. But if you desire Allah and His Messenger and the abode of the Hereafter, the verse continues. Then there is a warning as to be patient.

There are strong warnings in Surat at-Tahrim. Some of his wives misbehaved. But in general terms, Hazrat Aisha was exceedingly thoughtful toward our Prophet (saas) and loved him very. Very much. She got married at a very young age, as you know, but generally speaking it was a very great blessing for his wives to be with and serve the Prophet (saas). They both acquired knowledge and also enjoyed great bounty.

Our prophet (saas) was someone who knew all about passion. He was someone who knew all about depth. He was also exceptionally handsome. He had black eyes, as you know. He was well-built with broad shoulders. His hair was long and parted in the middle. He plaited it from time to time. He put kohl on his eyes and had a black beard and hair. He had very few white hairs until right before his death. His hair was largely black until the age of 63. That is a great miracle, Masha’Allah. He smelled very delightful. Our Prophet (saas) always smelled of roses. 

There was a mark on his back, on our Prophet’s (saas) back, just like Hazrat Mahdi (as). That will be handed down genetically right up to Hazrat Mahdi (as). Almighty Allah makes His wisdom, genetics, instrumental in this. Then in the End Times that seal will appear on the back of his descendant, Hazrat Mahdi (as), just as with our Prophet (saas) himself. 

Our Prophet (saas) was also very physically strong. He wrestled, and nobody ever beat him. He beat all his opponents. Masha’Allah. He made jokes, excellent and wise jokes. He was someone who experienced the blessing that is women in the most profound manner.

He was someone who gave women’s beauty its full due. He fully understood his wives’ beauty and saw in them a manifestation of Allah. And Allah bestowed many things upon him, Masha’Allah. Some people wonder why he married so many times. What more could Allah have bestowed upon our radiant and beloved Prophet (saas)? That was entirely correct. If I had had a daughter and been alive in the time of our Prophet (saas), I would have encouraged her to marry him right away and been proud and delighted by it.



ADNAN OKTAR: If a woman has no love for her husband, if she is convinced of that, then there is no sense in prolonging matters. Allah will provide for her. There is no need to hesitate out of a fear for the future. They should separate, politely, respectfully, without enmity, and without making a terrible fuss. 

REPORTER: What if the woman has children and nowhere else to go, no financial support, no source of income...?

ADNAN OKTAR: Impossible. Allah will definitely protect her. Allah will definitely guide her way. She must place her trust in Allah. If she has faith and is intelligent and pleasant natured, though such moral virtues are not easy to come by. They cannot easily be obtained. Of course a person may undergo difficulties if necessary. But that person will survive through passion and profound love. Happiness or suffering. She may not have much to eat, she may live in a tiny room, but she will be happy. Someone else may live in a palace yet still be unhappy. 

In other words, women who regard this as cunning and the logical thing to do always end up suffering. I see these things. Being rich does not make them happy, it actually makes them suffer even worse. That is why in those circumstances one must behave in an honorable way, in a manner befitting a Muslim. If she really does not love or respect him, if she can find no depth, passion or love in him, if she seeks a more powerful manifestation of Allah and regards him as morally weak and deficient, then of course the best thing is to separate. But it is totally dishonorable to separate for material reasons, for reasons such as his face or eyebrows being funny or his having run out of money. That is very ugly. Under those circumstances a Muslims puts his trust in Allah and is patient. Because one marries in the hope of being together for ever in the Hereafter. One cannot divorce one’s spouse for reasons such as those. One can never do that. But if they cannot get on for moral reasons, if there is a gulf between them in terms of faith and moral values, then they should separate. 


You refer to women who get divorced. And there are women who divorce secretly, in their hearts. There are ten times as many more of those. In other words, women are divorced in their hearts but carry on as if they were married. Given the chance they will disappear that same day. They will divorce that same day. But they carry on with the marriage for material reasons or because of social pressure. So for that reason, true divorce levels could rise many times over.



ADNAN OKTAR: It is something unlawful. Entering into an unlawful liaison without being married. No Muslim can do such a thing. Nobody who truly believes can shamelessly drink wine or hurt someone else. Muslims have no strength to do such things.


ADNAN OKTAR: For example, the body is not warned against adultery, it is unaffected. In adultery a Muslim’s body is paralyzed, they have to lose the power of reason and go mad. I mean their minds go numb in order to be able to behave in the light of such animal stirrings, in order to be able to give rise to such pollution. 


ADNAN OKTAR: Because cleanliness and faith are prerequisites in sexuality. Together with fear and love of Allah. And one loves the other person as a manifestation of Allah. One loves the other person, meaning the other soul created by Allah, and various feelings of satisfaction then arise in the soul. But a purely animal physical desire is just disgusting and repellent. And what such a person does is then just what animals do. It is out of the question to do such things with just anyone. A Muslim can only do this lawfully, if the other party fears and loves Allah a great deal, if both parties are spotlessly clean, as an act of worship, something of beauty. Because there will be a similar beauty in Paradise, which will arise as a blessing. Otherwise it is disgusting for two people to pollute one another like hogs, and in any case, after such a liaison both parties are immediately disgusted by one another. They suddenly come to loathe one another. This is very widespread in society, I hear.


ADNAN OKTAR: In other words, they immediately want to be rid of one another. Out of disgust. That means that Allah bestows disgust on them. But if a believer enters into a lawful liaison, his love and affection increase many times over. It is a great blessing to touch the other person, because a believer regards that flesh as a manifestation of Allah. A believer sees something holy, a cleanliness and beauty in it. But the other is just an animal instinct, and disgust arises as soon as that instinct has been satisfied. Because both parties regard one another as flesh to be touched, and the result is inevitably disgust.


ADNAN OKTAR: But in the other case there is Allah’s unification of two souls. A manifestation of His soul and the unification of two souls. There is cleanliness and holiness in that.

REPORTER: Insha’Allah. We are told that our Prophet (saas) advised young, single people to fast as a precaution on this subject. There may be hadith on the subject, I am not sure. Is this one way of reining in our earthly desires? What advice can you give young people?

ADNAN OKTAR:  For one thing a believer is very strong and healthy in sexual terms, and they will be even stronger and healthier so long as that is the case; they will be more alert and healthier and stronger. In other words, this is no reason for Muslims to suffer or exhaust themselves, but this rather makes them to be healthier and more alert. Society misinterprets this.


ADNAN OKTAR: In other words, it is regarded as a cause of tension and unease. That happens to animals, to cats and dogs and the like, and it causes them distress. It happens in reindeer. And in bison. It is something unique to animals in other words. There is no question of it in Muslims. It enables them to be more alert, healthy, lively, intelligent and sharp. It makes women beautiful and chaste. A female believer is very powerful so long as she retains her chastity, and lives by the warmth and cleanliness of chastity. No such thing would ever cross her mind, no such illicit action...

ADNAN OKTAR: A devout woman will be disgusted by such a thing and will be unable to tolerate it. Neither will a devout man be able to tolerate it, though both parties have this power. You know how people say, this or that food is good for this kind of thing. But there is really nothing of the sort and they are really just fooling themselves. Allah takes that power from them, he takes away that love of woman, and it is like looking for such and such a pharmaceutical in this or that food; it is not there. This is an effect and beauty He gives rise to in the soul. In other words, it is something that comes from the soul, not from foodstuffs. They can eat what they like, but Allah will not give rise to such an effect in such people.


ADNAN OKTAR: If a person has turned into an animal and enjoys animal pursuits, then he can engage in all kinds of filth and do all kinds of disgusting things. Such people have no limits. They will commit all the filth one can possibly imagine, because there is no longer any feeling of beauty, depth, passion or love in such people’s souls. They have turned into animals with bodily excesses to get rid of. Nothing makes any difference to such entities. And that is really nauseating, of course. In fact, such people even disgust themselves, as well as other people. Because Allah has made passion the measure by which a woman is affected. There is a power in woman, the power of passion, and that is what we call woman. Flesh and blood do not make a woman. A woman has two arms and legs, a normal woman anyway. But what we mean by woman is the power within her. Allah has bestowed a special, profound and influential force stemming from the faith inside her.  He has bestowed a sixth sense, and that is what we call woman. A woman cannot be affected in any other way, not by an idiot. A woman cannot be affected by someone stupid or mindless. Not even if she wants to be, she cannot do it and after all she does not want it. But let us imagine that it enters a woman’s mind. It will disgust her, and she cannot do it. In other words, an intelligent man can only affect an intelligent woman. A woman cannot be influenced just because a man has two arms and legs. The flesh has no such power, in other words. I have said this before.

REPORTER: Yes, last week…

ADNAN OKTAR: For example, they hang beef up in the butcher’s shop, so there is meat al over the place. But flesh means nothing. It could come from here or there, it is all the same stuff.

REPORTER: True. Last week you said that a beautiful woman was an intelligent woman. 

ADNAN OKTAR: Of course, because a very peculiar power arises in an intelligent woman. A power that defies description. For example, women can be pretty but stupid, looking around them with vacant expressions. I see that quite often. They look around them like wild ducks, and it is clear their souls are utterly empty. So what if these people possess flesh and arms and legs, there is nothing extraordinary about that, and nothing impressive about it, either.


ADNAN OKTAR: She has to be his halal (wife). She has to fear Allah and be trustworthy. She has to be spotless and not tell lies. She must have severed all ties to satan and have the depth to demonstrate a life-time of loyalty. You cannot find these things in people who are not also beautiful. Such people are definitively beautiful. Allah gives them an astounding beauty and makes them beautiful in all they do.


ADNAN OKTAR: You say that there are friends who say, who think that Pisces and Aquarius signs are compatible with eachother and that there marriage would  be okay. My advice to such friends would be; let them go and see the judicial records, look at the divorce files in the countrs, see the people who are in jail because of capital offence, people who are in jail because of assault and batter of a high and aggravated nature, they will se ethat a lot of them are pisces and aquarius signs. 

REPORTER: Is that so?

ADNAN OKTAR: Of course.

REPORTER: Sir, by the way my sign is pisces as well

ADNAN OKTAR: No, being pisces is not something bad, pisces, not in that meaning.  I also am known as aquarius. I mean that is not something that could be believed in, I mean I am just saying this to stress on their being just fallacies.


ADNAN OKTAR: They think that this person’s sign is Leo and that is compatible with this and that sign, but let them go and see. 

REPORTER:  Sir, for a moment I got a bit afraid when you said that. 

ADNAN OKTAR: No let them go and see the judicial records  They will see that it is not the case.  Compatibility would only be real by the power of wisdom, depth and the fear of Allah. For example if a person is sure of that woman’s fear from Allah, I for example am sure about that person’s fear of Allah. I am sure that she loves Allah deeply, I am sure that she believes in Allah. That would constitute a form of guarantee for me, I mean that would be a guarantee form e about that woman. Then I would feel relieved.  Then what do l look for, I look for sincerity for example.  If that person has all these features, she would anyway be sincere. She would be genuine. First of all a sincere person would never lie. Then a perfect human being starts appear.  On top of all, someone carrying all these characteristics would anyway be beautiful physically as well. That is to say Allah would beautify her, turn her into someone very amiable. I mean her manners would be beautiful, her voice, her address would be beautiful, her gazes would be beautiful, her skin wolud be beautiful, her exquisiteness, her manners  everything about her would be very beautiful. If that is not the case, I mean if she doesn’t have fear from Allah, I mean that kind of a woman would be very very dangerous, I mean she can do anything, she can rat, she can double cross , she can play games. I mean she can do things that you cannot even begin to imagine or visualize,I mean a person cannot even be sure of his own life there. I mean he will be trying to defend his own life. I mean he would be in mortal fear,that is to say he would be thinking about how he could protect his own life. For that reason, happiness would not be an issue in such an environment. If you pay enough attention to such marriages, you will see that threats of divorce would be flying around from morning till night. They would be just newly married, on their third  day divorce would be a subject on their agenda. The woman would slam the door and leave , would go to her father’s house, and a stink would be raised. Then the man would go to her father’s house, take her and bring her back, they come back home. I mean a miff every second day, a stink kicked up every second day, people saying negative things about eachother, I mean such allusive words, such ironic addresses; theirs’ would be a very restless, uneasy life.


2009-07-27 04:46:53

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